Sunday, January 25, 2015

1-25-15_3

Observational Drawing

Week 1: Assignment 1 Practice Exam

Assignment 1: Exam





Grading Summary

Grade Details - All Questions










1-25-15_2



Observational Drawing Week 1 Autobiography





Autobiography

By Tuesday, January 20, 2015, please write an autobiography that states your drawing-related experience and include a pre-instructional self-portrait using graphite on drawing paper. It is understood that this drawing will be completed with no prior direction from this course. The drawing will not be graded based on quality; it will simply be used to measure your overall growth in the course. Do your best given your current skill level, and have fun with this exercise.

Please review the following guidelines to complete this drawing to the best of your ability:
Set up a mirror on a wall in a dimly lit room, and position yourself in front of it so that you can see yourself comfortably for an extended period.
Place your paper vertically on an easel or on a drawing board propped against the back of a chair so that it is parallel to the picture plane.
Position your easel and paper so they are facing you and allow you a clear view of both the mirrored image of yourself and the paper as you draw.
Establish a distinct light source on your face. Keep in mind, the higher the wattage of the bulb in your lamp and the closer the light source is to the figure, the more dramatic the shadows.
Look closely at your face and then draw your reflection in the mirror.





My Work






Bridgette Bandell   1/21/2015 7:26:58 PM


Hello everyone, my name is Bridgette Bandell and I am a stay at home 29yr old mother of 2 children… well, 3 if you count my fiance'. My experience with drawing is anything but formal. I have drawn basic  Disney Characters for my children when we ran out of coloring pages desired, but that is simple copying, looking at the lines and drawing them on another paper. My children think its cooler when I draw it from the page than when I scan It., so we don’t waste the ink anymore. I have also sketched some original drawings but have never done anything multi-dimensional or with a subject to use as reference. I always just drew from my imagination and I am figuring out that drawing from subject matter physically in front of you is actually harder for me than drawing from imagination because I’m constantly correcting my work for fear that it doesn't look right. Hopefully through this course I can get better because my initial drawing of myself isn’t desirable and instead of drawing with my mind for what I thought I looked like, I drew what I saw in the mirror. Proving that this was going to be harder than I thought. In addition to my actual drawing on this assignment, I added a picture of me. What I look like and what I was looking at when I was drawing. (Of course, when I went to get my camera, my hair moved so you couldn't see my ear, but you get the general idea.)






1-25-15

Alright, new year, new apartment, new life, new start.... I'm a student at The Art Institute of Pittsburgh and I've decided that I'm going to start showing off my work. This is MY Journal and as the title states, my Escape.. so I'm going to do whatever I want... I'm going to be sharing assignments as I complete them. Not for any specific reason... just because I feel like it.. But first, the course descriptions::


The classes I'm taking right now are: 








and 










:-) Assignments will follow as the ones I've already completed, and then the rest will be in succession. 

Saturday, January 24, 2015

1-24-15

Quitting smoking is proving to be harder this time than it was last time... I swear I'm just... I want one, but I don't WANT one... I also have had a lapse in counseling visits My counselor went out of town and rescheduled everyone so I won't be seeing her again until almost March, I mis my sister, I am trying to plan a wedding without knowing what the heck I'm doing... I just wish I could get a job... my mind is all over the place and I'm doing my best to get everything done, but if al I do is keep the house clean and kids alive, happy, clean-ish, and fed, I'm happy... lol Just wish this quitting smoking thing was easier. :/ 

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Non-Resolution 2015

This year... I'm not making a resolution... Resolutions are things that people say they'll do and then a month later lax out on.... No... Not me not this time.
This year I'm making myself promises... Not resolutions.
I promise to
A.) keep kicking ass in school 
B.) get a job and keep it!!
C.) learn from my mistakes
D.) quit smoking!! (Doing okay so far)
E.) plant my roots... No more moving around.
F.) buy a car!
G.) lose weight... Even if it's just one pound, I want to try!!
H.) grow my hair back out. I miss it being long.
I.) love Bryan and our children more every day.
J.) save money for Christmas 2015
K.) help my sister visit me... She needs a vacation and I miss her.
L.) meet Mylissa finally!!
M.) love myself for just being me. It's hard for me, I swear...
N.) Do one good deed for no reason for a random person every month(more if I can)
O.) laugh every day
P.) drain the bathtub whoever I take a bath before Bryan reminds me to(just ask... He'll tell Ya lol)
Q.) have patience with my kids more often(they're kids... Yeah, it gets stressful lol)
R.) choose my battles
S.) pay my bills on time and pay back those I owe
T.) not write 2014 on everything I sign for the first few months of the new year
U.) take my meds every day without being reminded or missing a dose
V.) watch Star Wars with Bryan like i promised
W.) learn to play Magic The Gathering like I promised Bryan and Tyler i would
X.) keep all my scheduled appointments
Y.) stop being late for nearly everything I go to
Z.) be thankful for everything I have every day.
I realize it's a lot, but they are all things important to me. So instead of making a resolution.... I've decided I'm just gonna make sure I do everything I can to be a better me and check off my 2015 ABCs.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

10-21-14

Okay so I was reading a cute little article and at the end was a "Top Ten Ways To Know You've Found The One". So naturally I decided to have a peek... And while reading them HE popped into my head for every one. He does each and every one of these...! I think he's the real deal. I have found my twin flame. And I can't wait to be free from this chained prison where I feel I have to hide who I am from everyone but him. In case you're wondering... These are the ten signs I read. ^_^ 



1. Not everyone is sexually compatible, so when you find someone who shares your sexual interests, it's something to keep in mind. He's right there with you. He shares your idea of romance and makes sure it happens for you both, regardless of how silly it may sound to someone else.

2. One thing you've probably already realized is that you don't have to fake anything around him. It doesn't matter if you're at a good place in life or at your lowest point. The fact is, he knows who you truly are and doesn't expect you to be anything else. You could have quite a few bad traits you're still trying to improve, but he'll still think the sun shines out of your... well, you get it.

3. A lot of couples who've had a long, happy marriage will tell you; what is their partner's happiness is their happiness. True love doesn't get jealous for the other succeeding or deem it as insignificant. If you truly love each other, you are genuinely happy about the things that make your partner happy and he's genuinely happy about the things that please you too.

4. You could have had the best day in the world, but it just doesn't feel complete if you haven't shared some of it with him. You could have been thought the absolute worst day you've had in recent memory, and even with a million things running through your head, all you want is him.

5. Have you ever seen those couples where one person is way better looking than the other and yet, they're both just as into each other? It doesn't matter who finds either of you attractive, what matters is that you're so into each other. You mutually find each other physically, mentally and spiritually attractive!

6. Of course you're already sharing life with him, but when he's "the one" you will want to share everything with him. You want to have experiences with him, you want to plan your future with him, when you picture your life five years down the road, it's him by your side.

7. Love is not selfish. A truly loving relationship is not one-sided for either party and neither of you are simply focused on getting your own way. Instead of fighting all the time about the dumbest things, you learn to work together to make both parties happy.

8. You want a guy who listens to you, but you want him to also actually HEAR what you're saying. This is the guy who has truly taken note of the things you're saying and learned all about what you like, dislike and feel about any given situation.

9. It is so important that you're with a guy who loves you for who you are. True love is without condition, so even if you feel like you're too talkative, not talented enough or aren't the exact dress size you want to be, he doesn't care and he loves you for you.

10. Not only does he love you for you, he tells his loved ones about you. You are the person he is proud to be in a relationship with and he wants to make sure all of the other important people in his life know about it.





Thursday, October 16, 2014

10-16-14

Night before last SHE threatened to throw ryn through a window. And I flipped! I told her if she does I'll kill her.    And then the fight started. Telling me all I do all day is sleep this past week. 
Well of course!! I had surgery a week ago! I'm in pain! I'm tired from my meds.. This all started because Ryn glared at her. SHE told Ryn to clean her room, ryn glared at her, she threatened to throw her through a window!! I told my counselor. And she says she fears for the safety of teetah after we leave. And since SHE already has an open cps case, my counselor is going to file a report. SHE went to jail a few weeks back. For slapping the fuck out of her mom. Her mother that has stage 3 lung cancer btw. SHE went to court and lied her ass off and says that she only smacked her once and that she's not a violent person and blah blah and got off with $300 fines and 2yr probation. Hubs and I found a place that's $110 cheaper a month for rent. Bigger place. Same bed and bathrooms. 3bd 2ba duplex. $750/mo. Landlord said he will take 1/2 off the first month rent if we have the entire sec dep and we can move in nov 1st.  As long as the applications go through okay. We put in the apps Wednesday at 3am. Lol He is filing for bubba cause that's his son. But teetah isn't his... So we are going to see if CPS will place her with us at least until her grandfather is made aware of the situation and we are pretty sure he will take her.  If he doesn't, we plan to file for Taea through cps and see if we can get her. But SHE has gone bat shit crazy and the fact that she sits on the computer from sun up till she passes out... Bothers me. We don't plan on telling SHE until the lease is signed at the new place.  That way when SHE flips... We can run. I've been having nightmares about telling her. Things like... We went and told her that we were leaving and she threw a book at hubs and started beating the shit out of me. 
The kids will already be safe at hub's moms house before we tell her. 

I'm just tired of abusive relationships. My counselor said she thinks I'm doing the right thing and that hubs seems to be a much better fit for me. Since we are on the same level maturity and responsibility levels. 

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

10-1-14

So I asked the hard questions of myself... And decided I am leaving. The threats. The screaming. The demeaning. I can't handle it anymore. I can't handle the feeling of being manipulated. The feeling like I was brought here... Not for her... But to do the things she doesn't want to be doing. Like my job is to handle anything that she would normally complain about. I want to be in a relationship with someone who shows with actions that I am desired. And it's not just sex. Kisses. Hugs. Touching my skin... Anywhere, pretty much.. Talking to me about random bullshit. Sitting by me for no reason. Supporting my desires in and out of the bedroom. I just want to be with someone that's afraid of losing me for a change. Someone that strives to make me as happy as I try to make them... Someone that likes my smile. Someone that does stupid things to make me laugh when I'm down. Someone that understands that when I'm sick I'm a big baby and as such need taken care of. Someone that understands my submissive side and wants to be that dominant support I need in a mate.

I told him I am planning on leaving tonight... And he started to tear up.. And he asked me not to leave him. He asked why I was leaving and I told him everything. I planned on telling HER at a later time.. After I had a place to go... And he told me he wasn't happy with her.  That he hasn't been for quite some time. And that he wants to go with me. So.... We have decided after a long 3 hour serious talk... That we love each other too much and get along too well.... To let the other go. 

So he is leaving with me. We are going to start over just us. There are many aspects that make me feel like I've found my twin flame... My eternal soulmate.. The one... When I'm with him.. It's like... I've never felt so connected to anyone before like this in my life. I can't explain it really... I'll write more later, I have to run in the store. 

Until next time

Love
Always
Birdie Lou'

Saturday, September 27, 2014

9-27-14

Well, today was productive. I managed to get all of Micah's room cleaned, his toys organized and completely revamp his room night before last. Last night I got the girls room cleaned up finally.... and removed all the trash and toys and clothes from their room. During the day Sheryl and I went through the girls toys and threw away all the trashed broken or useless ones. Then I managed to wash 14 loads of laundry to get the girls entire wardrobe clean. I'm working through the blankets and sheets now.

I cut tonight.. for the first time in months, I cut myself. I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to stop myself so bad. Bill told me he plans to marry this woman and last night told me he had a one night stand with some random chick he met at a store. I am so disapointed in him. I can't believe he has done this. That he is going to marry this woman e has never met and has only known for a couple weeks... all because he wants to be married. He told me he doesn't love her and yet is going to marry her... this made me over the edge sad... upset... hurt... and so many other things all at once.
What happened to the man I looked up to for 8 years? What happened to the man that swore he'd never marry someone he didn't love. Held marriage high and with great honor...? I missed him.... but this isn't the real him. It's a fake shell of someone I used to know. and I don't like it.

I had plans with Sheryl today to try and cuddle and have some us time... but that didn't happen. She never moved from the computer. :( I just want affection. I miss the feeling that I'm needed, loved, and desired. I don't feel pretty... I don't even feel.... attractive in the least.

Nobody ever touches me anymore without me hinting at it. Nobody wants me.
I can't wait for my next counselor appointment. I'm..... I'm just going to hope she has some good ideas on how to deal with this all. Because I'm lost and can't think of what to do and I feel like that little girl in a room that nobody will come into because nobody wants to play with me.

I miss feeling like I'm wanted. I don't feel like Sheryl wants me... not like I used to feel it. She used to hug or kiss me randomly, she stopped...
she used to try hard to get me to lay next to her... she stopped...
I hate sleeping on the couch, I truly do.

I slept in the bed with Bryan last night... it was nice, but, he still has some learning to do.. I'm so frustrated by all of this... I'm horny all the time and can't fix it because nothing helps... I have vibrators and they don't help, I have tried... they only work for a few minutes and then I'm right back up there again.... If I had sex as much as I've been wanting to lately then everyone in this house would think I'm a whore. I think about it constantly. I mean... all the time.... I can't think of anything else most of the time, because I can't get past the horny. I'm so nervous about this procedure ... this vaginal mesh bladder sling thing that the dr wants me to get... I... I'm scared... He said we need to schedule it next week... He was adamant about it too.... I tried getting him to schedule it for the week after next, but he really wants to do it next week... I'm so worried something will happen that I'm just freaking out...

My panic attacks are getting worse each day. I had 4 today alone. I can't handle this much more.
I've applied at a few places to work, but can't find another job. My phone got turned off, so I need a new one and can't afford it... My bills are piling up around me and I have no money to pay them. Something has got to give here because I can't deal with this much longer.... I need to feel like my hopes and dreams and needs matter too... really soon.... because I can't just ignore my needs forever... it'll break me, and I'll end up dying inside... and Eryn needs me.

I think I am going to go take a bath for a while... maybe my vibrator will help me tonight for more than just to postpone it for five minutes...